Sorry I had to end that last update short. I should have just saved it for later, but I didn’t wanna leave my readers with nothing. Here goes Part 2(of 4) of my “26 of the Best Tweets Ever” series. If you missed the first entry I suggest you start here!
I gave a tramp a Cuban cigar today. Hey, I can afford it and anyway he always calls me Sir… respect goes a long way in my world.
Forming a coalition government with my wife to take control of the house back from my cat. Your reign of terror is over, fish breath.
This is not the greatest tweet in the world… it is a tribute… a tribute to the greatest tweet in the world.
(Shout out to whoever gets this reference.)
It’s Thursday, which is “Friday Eve” in Optimisian.
love how some dudes hate me for dating their fantasy girl, as if they were going to if I hadn’t.
K: Kanye West
Boyfriends are like rush hour traffic… ALWAYS IN THE FUCKING WAY!
MY BOY JAY-Z AND I ARE IN THE LAB WORKING ON A SONG. RIGHT NOW THE HOOK GOES “OH LEBRON YOU SO LEBRON” I’M LIKE YEAH BOY BUT JAY SEEMS SAD.
I can’t get enough of some of these tweets. Especially “Lebron James’ Ego”. It’s funny how someone has that much time on their hands to dedicate a twitter account to being so egotistical while acting like a celebrity.
I hope you’ll join me tomorrow for 26 of the Best Tweets Ever(Part 3.)
Be sure to comment and let me know which is your favorite so far. If you have any suggestions, please feel free to send them my way. You can either mention me on twitter, leave a comment below, or email me at email@example.com