In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog..


“According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you’re better off in the casket than doing the eulogy.” – Jerry Seinfeld

At the moment, I’m taking a public speaking class. Well, I’m not in the class right now, but I AM there Wednesdays. The teacher is a real swell guy. He stated after our first intermission(it’s a 3 hour and 50 minute class.), “If you have perfect attendance throughout the semester, you will receive 3 extra credit points on your final average. If you are late, however, I’ll allow you to make it up by singing us a song.” Wouldn’t you know it, I was late on the first day so I had to sing a song. I wasn’t the only one who was late, so the teacher made the 6 of us come to the front of the class room and sing “Happy Birthday” to those who were seated. [Yesterday, the teacher was late coming back from intermission, so I locked him out, and we made HIM sing a song for being late. Top Ten Nominee.]

Public Speaking is hard for some people. Social anxiety can take over the body and make you freeze when you’re in front of an audience. Just yesterday, the class had to present their first speech, the topic, “A ‘Most Influential’ Person in my life.” Now, for many people this might come easy. You have to remember though, it’s not a question that we’re asked that often. It was time for, let’s call her Shalonda, to present. She got up in front of the class, went to the podium in the far corner of the class, but balked. She had to take a minute, go outside the class, and recollect herself. This is a prime example of Social Anxiety. Our teacher calls it “The demon in the back of your head.” Often times these “demons” are just your subconscious feeding into your fear of rejection. It’ll tell you things like “What if your audience laughs AT you instead of WITH you?” or “What if my I make a fool of myself?”

Once Shalonda returned to the class, she gave a wonderful speech. It was almost as if she conquered her “demons.” You could tell she still had a little bit of fear inside her because she was figgeting with her hands a little. I must say, at first, I thought she was going to cry, but she came a long way and “delivered the goods”, so to speak.

Our next assignment has to be memorized. It teaches us the values of body language and expression through words. It can be a monologue, a song, or a poem. It doesn’t have to be original. With that in mind, I began looking through some of my movies, searching for a good monologue. So far, here are my options:

  • Clerks
  • Fight Club
  • Boondock Saints
  • Good Fellas
  • The Goonies

Day 02 — Your favorite movie

My favorite movie of all time would have to go to Fight Club. I first watched the movie at a friends house and fell in love with the acting. The movie itself is such a mind-fuck. Most people will try and claim that they knew a plot twist was coming forth, but they’re full of shit. You can’t possibly know about the events that are lead into toward the end. It’s just not something you can guess. Regardless, this movie is filled with intelligent dialogue(may be misspelling that one) that really makes you think.

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Comments
6 Responses to “In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog..”
  1. TheIdiotSpeaketh says:

    In college I had to take Speech. Hated it! Hated getting up talking in front of people! Hated it with a passion. In College, during the summers, I was a Cave Guide for the Natl Park Service, taking groups of strangers on tours all day long, 6 days a week. Go figure.

  2. unabridgedgirl says:

    Hahaha! Brave man, locking the teacher out. (I gather he has a good sense of humor, though.)

  3. Amy says:

    I took acting lessons for years and did community and school plays from elementary all through high school. Getting up in front of people and making a fool of myself is my speciality. If they laugh with me or at me, I don’t care cause if they are laughing then they are not asleep and that’s half the battle right there! Have fun with the class!
    Oh and I nominate Boondock Saints for your monologue. LOVE that movie!

  4. mct88 says:

    oh taking a speech class! impressed most def! i didn’t dislike speech but I don’t like it either… the audience is always a tough crowd!

    • TonyVote says:

      the audience is always a tough crowd. I had them going in my first speech. I’m actually posting it soon.

      I like my public speaking class. We’ve got 12 students or so, the teacher is super-funny, and even though it’s a 3.5 hour class, he gives us a 15 minute break after each of the first 2 hours. I only meet once a week which, in my opinion, is the only downfall of the class.

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  1. […] talked about my Public Speaking class recently, and I figured I’d give you guys a glimpse at how I’m doing. This here is the first […]



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